Tag: self soothing

I asked Twitter What is their Favorite Way to Pick Themselves Back Up after A Bad Day, and these were their responses!

Liz Masu2 Comments

I have been experiencing a lot of anxiety and depression, and I know for myself, it happens when I don’t physically take care of myself.

I have not really eaten substance for days, and I have been sleeping late. And physical health has a direct effect on my mental health personally.

So, one day I asked Twitter, what is something you do to pick yourself back up after a bad day? These were the replies:

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There were a lot of replies that had to do with taking care of your physical health, or treating yourself to something you love, or even a peaceful time. People felt at peace and happier when they spent time with their significant other and their pets that they love.

Most Common Responses

  • Sleep
  • Eat
  • Watch something
  • Spend time with loved ones (animal + human)
  • Read a book

Realization

More than just everyone having something to help them feel better, you notice that everyone had something they immediately do to take care of themselves, and most of these are very healthy options to revert your attention to when struggling with a bad day.

The entire world is struggling whether you can see it in their face or not, and the best thing we can do, is not act and make conclusions on our emotions, but rather, take time to take care of our current emotional state before we move on.

The fact that so many people already had their go to feel better choice, shows how everyone is just trying to keep going in this life, and has accepted that life just really sucks sometimes, but there are reasons to maintain your mental health and keep going.

Moving Forward

I am not gonna lie. I am not emotionally stable, ever. But as I take care of my physical health and surround myself with healthy genuine people, it has been easier to regulate my mental health, and learn the importance of a community.

I have been able to identify when my mind skews a situation and when I don’t need to feel anxiety. No, I am not perfect at all, and I am learning the basics of maintaining my mental health to keep going in my life.

Ending my life is not really an option, so my other option is to learn how to keep going.

Find your Self-Soothing Activity

If you feel similar to me, find your self soothing activity. And know yourself. That means, know what triggers you and why. What makes you happy and sad, know why you react the way you react. The wisest people know themselves very well.

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10 ways to pick yourself out of a gloomy mood

Liz MasuLeave a comment

There are several reasons why you could be in a dreary drab mood. Whether you just got broken up with, you heard some bad news, your hormones make you feel irritated, or you just wake up and feel dreary from the gloomy weather.

Sometimes we just don’t feel the best, and we can’t get out of bed. Or maybe we feel sad and we can’t even pin point why. It happens, and you will have days like that in life.

We are humans and emotions are a huge part of our beings that we can’t just ignore.

So how do we get out of the gloomy feeling?

Here are some ideas to get you back up and running:

1. Remind yourself that your just not having a good day.

Sometimes we like to equate a bad day or a bad week to a bad life, but it does not have to be like that. Your entire outlook of your life is based on your perspective. Two people can have the same life, but one can think they have a great life overall, and one can hate their life. It’s really all about perspective.

Sometimes we do have gloomy days and we just need to let it be gloomy. Sometimes we just need to treat ourselves in ways that we wouldn’t on a normal day to pick ourselves up, which brings us to number two.

2. Treat yourself with food

What is that meal that you love but can’t have often because you reserved it for special occasions? This would be the perfect time to get it!

Whether it’s the chicken Alfredo from Olive Garden or the pink drink at Starbucks, treat yourself with something to make the moment feel a little more special and different.

3. Treat yourself with something you’ve been wanting.

Have you had something in your Amazon cart or Princess Polly cart that has just been sitting there in one of your million tabs on your internet browser? Maybe today is that day!

Buying a little something that you have been wanting gives you a little pick me up to look forward to.

4. Go to the gym

Working out really helps your mental health. While you work out, you release endorphins, therefore becoming happier. It definitely makes you feel less sluggish and gloomy.

5. Hang out with friends

When you are gloomy, it is the worst feeling when you are alone. Not because you are alone, but your thoughts are your own to battle with at that point. Just because you feel something, does not mean that it is reality.

The best thing you can do is get out of your head, and having a friend with you can force yourself out of your head because there is a someone else in your immediate space that is demanding your attention. Therefore, it forces you to get out of your head more than it would if you were alone.

6. Have a little movie marathon with your favorite snacks

Have you been meaning to watch the Harry Potter series for a while? Or any series?

Grab your favorite candies and tastiest snacks, make yourself an amazing smoothie, light those candles, set the mood, and start that series you’ve always wanted to watch.

When your feeling this way, it is best to do whatever you can to get out of that headspace until your in a better mind to understand why you feel like that. But first and foremost, take care of yourself.

7. Take a walk with music

The brisk air has benefits to your mind that you may not realize! Listening to your favorite music as your breathing in fresh air, doing some cardio, can do some chemical rewiring and refreshing to your brain and help you have a different perspective!

Don’t under estimate a good walk in the park!

8. Drink some water

Believe it or not, you can just feel this way because you are dehydrated. Don’t rule out a good cup of water. Staying hydrated can give you energy and refresh your brain.

It’s a simple solution but it doesn’t hurt to try it to rule it out!

9. Take a nap

Sometimes you may feel this way because you need a nap.

Physical work can drain our energy, emotions can drain our energy, overworking our brains can drain our energy, and not doing enough can also drain our energy.

Sometimes the best solution to have is just to take a good refreshing nap and wake up ready to restart your mind and soul.

10. Spa Day

Lastly, have a spa day at home. This is my favorite because I love pampering myself.

Put on that clay face mask you got from Ulta, or the hair mask you picked up on your Target run!

Give yourself a bubble bath with candles as you watch your favorite movies with your laptop in the toilet seat. We all know you do it!

These are so inexpensive but makes the experience of relaxation go a long way. When you start taking care of yourself, you learn to take care of your mind.

Conclusion

We all have gloomy days. It happens, and it is normal. It is also very important to address. Your mental health should come first before anything else. It effects your entire livelihood. Because you are the only person who lives your life, you need to make sure that it is taken care of.

If you have any other tips, share them below!

Self Care Vs. Self Soothing

Liz MasuLeave a comment

When you are sad or depressed, and the first thing that media tells you to do if practice self care. This was trending for the longest time to find a way to take care of yourself and put yourself first.

So when I was very depressed for years and tried everything to get myself back on my feet, I, too, tried self care.

What is self care? Well, what the media was describing self care was bubble baths, retail therapy, taking down time to watch your favorite TV shows, going out and doing something fun.

And that is exactly what I did. A lot.

I have developed an inexcusable habit of retail therapy and called it “Self Care”. Taking care of myself by doing things that make me happy. And I say happy because happy is a temporary emotion. But in actuality, I was spending more money than I needed to, I was eating out so many times and blowing money left and right. I wasn’t balancing my life correctly. Yes, indulge in things that make you happy, but keep a good balance in your life.

That being said. We have often confused “Self Care” and “Self Soothing”.

This description that we have been telling ourselves that “Self Care” is actually Self Soothing. The very definition of “Soothing” in Google is “having a gently calming effect”. When you calm someone down, you may be distraction yourself, or treating yourself. Doing things that you know will make you happy. For example, soothing a baby when it’s crying and acting out, you basically give the baby what it wants!

Self Care is a whole different ball game. The definition of “Care” in Google is “the provision of what is necessary for the health, welfare, maintenance, and protection of someone or something.”

Necessary is our key word here. Necessary for health, welfare, maintenance, and protecting someone. Bubble baths are not necessary to have good health. Shopping is not necessary for the maintenance of someone. Especially not retail therapy. Spending money on all those trips are not necessary for your livelihood.

Self care means taking care of yourself as if someone else was taking care of you.

  1. Brushing your teeth
  2. Showering
  3. Cooking food for yourself
  4. Sleeping on time
  5. Waking up on time
  6. Budgeting your money
  7. Maintaining your responsibilities
  8. Doing your laundry
  9. Washing your dishes

And it really isn’t that easy. I know. It takes a lot of effort. But the moment you accomplish brushing your teeth on the daily, you start healing and taking care of yourself. Picking yourself back up. Budgeting your money so you aren’t self sabotaging yourself.

The moment you start these little tasks, your life starts to change. Even when you haven’t done any mental work yet.

But how do I even do this? How should I encourage myself to do these things?

  1. Set Alarms on your phone
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I know you have your phone on you at all times. If you don’t, you are a different species that I may not be able to help. Set your alarms on your phone and make a million of them.

  • When to wake up
  • When to make breakfast
  • When to start getting ready
  • When to leave for work to be there on time
  • When to eat dinner
  • When to do a task that you need to do
  • When you brush your teeth
  • When to read
  • When to go to sleep

And it will be very hard to follow your alarms, but you need to try. Maybe you procrastinate for the first couple of days or weeks, but always strive to listen when the alarms go off.

2. Make a list

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This one works for me the best. Make a list of the things you have to do. Preferably have this list on your refrigerator or the most common place you will see it. Then, write a bunch of tasks that you need to do, but not only the important tasks, but also write the smallest tasks. Such as brushing your teeth, ordering a meal (if you can’t make meals yet, just make sure you eat), making your bed, drinking water, or charging your phone.

These small tasks are very accomplishable, and are non threatening for you to take care of yourself slowly. Don’t tackle it all at once. Nobody is making you. If they are, take some space from them. You have every right to go at your own speed because it is your life. Every time you check off the tasks, you will feel more motivated and make sure you take a little pride in every task you accomplish!

3. Accountability

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I know you aren’t in the mindset of it. But just tell your friend your plans to get back on your feet. Have a friend, have a therapist or a family member help you with taking accountability of your goals. Make sure this friend is graceful with your timing and your pain and struggle. When you feel like you are truly struggling, have a friend come and help you cook or get your ass to take a shower. Or just do it for you. If you don’t have a friend like that, you may need to act like your own friend. The act of your apartment getting clean and your own body being maintained is a form of caring about yourself. You making the effort of it getting done.

If you are not at your best state and you want to get back up. Self soothing is great once a week or twice a week. But try to spend your energy with self care. Taking care of your mind, body, and soul. Taking care of your living area. You will slowly feel yourself taking back the power of your own life. You are the only one who is able to truly take care of yourself at the end of the day. Nobody can (or should) really make you do anything.

So drink some water. You got this. 🙂